Confessions of a Working Mom

Being a working mom has been on my mind lately. It started off when I went back to work.
Then I read this post on Not Super - Just Mom. And I realized something: I like being a working mom.

Prior to Isaac, I always said that I'd love to be a stay at home mom if I could. Maternity leave gave me a new perspective though. I want to be clear: it wasn't anything about Isaac that changed my mind. It was more the reality of being a mom to two small children and just how much work it really is.

The fact is, I'm a better mom when I work. Prior to going back to work, I was struggling with postpartum depression. I didn't have any patience with Gabe or Isaac. Work balances me out. Yes, I'm away from them for 40 hours a week and its a bit chaotic trying to stay on top of the ball and make sure everyone is fed, bathed, clothed and ready for the next day. But it keeps my mind busy and it makes me value my time with them that much more.

When I'm home, I lack motivation to do things. I procrastinate and put things off, then one of the kids needs something and I don't get around to doing what needs to get done around the house. Then I start to lose patience with the kids. Then I feel guilty and beat myself up for losing patience with them or for not getting things done.

When I'm working, I don't have the luxury of procrastination. Certain things have to get done - bottles have to get washed and prepared for the next day, the kids have to be bathed before they go to bed, because there is no time for all that in the morning. I also have an easier time letting myself off the hook for the little things that don't *have* to get done right away. Laundry and swept floors can wait guilt-free until tomorrow because a certain 2 year old wants to snuggle with Mommy on the couch and watch "Backpack" (a.k.a Dora the Explorer). In short, I don't sweat the small stuff when I work.

I also have the luxury of having my kids attend a wonderful daycare. Both Gabe and Isaac thrive at "school". I can leave them knowing they are in capable hands and that they are going to get everything their little minds and bodies need to grow while I'm at work. I'm constantly amazed at the things Gabe picks up at school. The other day, he counted to eight... in Spanish! I didn't even know they did Spanish! Everyday, they are exposed to new experiences and lessons that I could not give them at home.

Then there's the money. I don't make great money. In fact, I'm underpaid when you look at all the things I do at work. And yes, a good portion of what I make goes towards daycare costs. I won't lie, its frustrating to have so little left after payday. Honestly, we could probably make it on Armando's salary alone. But I have to stop and remind myself that I work so that we can have the level of living that we do. The reason we have savings to do the things we want to do with the boys, to buy the minivan we just bought, to live in the house/neighborhood that we do and to send the boys to that wonderful daycare, is because I work.

So yeah, I'm a little slice of happy these days. And a good part of that is because I'm a working mom.